Goodbye, I Miss You, Hello
by KayDrew
Summary: What if Lorelai became pregnant right before their big fight? What might happen? Part 4 of 4 is up. Please R & R!
1. Lorelai

LORELAI

_It happened two weeks before our fight. And it was like I was in an episode of The Outer Limits. Luke and I were getting along better than we ever had. We were so happy. Miss Patty and Babbette told me that I looked like I was floating on air and I think I was. How could it all change in that one instant? How can it change with one fight? _

* * *

Lorelai Gilmore sat at the kitchen table. In her hands, she held a pregnancy test that had two pink lines. She glanced at the empty box on the table that told the results of each line. Two pink lines ment she was pregnant. "How could this happen," she asked the empty room. Lorelai knew how it had happened, but she still had to ask that question.

Nervously, she looked at the wall clock. Rory would be here in twenty minutes. _That will give me enough time to get ready_, Lorelai thought, sobbing slightly, _I need to get out of here._ Lorelai felt just like she did when she was sixteen. She felt trapped, confused, and scared.

She stood and placing the pregnancy test on the table, walked through the kitchen and up the steps. Taking a right, into her bedroom she looked around the room. "Where is my suitcase? Why did it decide to be a Houdini all of a sudden? I know I just saw it," Lorelai muttered to herself, "Ah, there it is!" She went over to the corner of her room, and removing the clothes from atop of the large case, she carried it to her bed. Throwing it onto it, she went to closet and randomly chose clothing and threw them haphazardly in her suitcase. She was just finishing packing when she heard the front door open and Rory call out, "Mom!"

"I'm upstairs," Lorelai called out. As she zipped up her bag, she listened to RZory come up the stairs and stop at her room.

"Are you and Luke going on a trip," she asked.

Slowly, Lorelai turned and looked at her daughter. "Well, uh, you see…no, Luke and I aren't. I am. Have to. Luke and I…broke up."

"What? Were you even going to tell me? Were you going to tell me that you were leaving or were you going to pull a Ginger Rogers and just waltz out of Starshollow," Rory asked as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Of course I was going to tell you. Rory, I-I'm pregnant with Luke's baby. I have to go. I can't stay here."

"Woah, woah, woah. Are you sure," Rory asked as she sat down on the bent at the end of the bed, "Why can't you stay here? What about the Inn?"

"Oh, honey. I'm sure. I have to go. Sookie can take care of the inn as well as Michael," Lorelai said, "I will back. Don't worry. It won't be long. I just need to get away. Please, don't tell Luke though. I will tell him, when the time's right."

"Don't play an Anna and wait twelve years," Rory warned.

"I won't," Lorelai said, kissing Rory on the forehead, "I love you." Lorelai started to cry. She wiped them away, but they continued to fall.

"I do too," Rory said as she pulled a tissue out and blew her nose.

"I wish I had a big speech to give in farewell, but I don't. Bye-bye, Rory." Lorelai stood. She grabbed her bag and left without looking back. She couldn't.

* * *

That was six years ago. Lorelai had moved to Memphis, not telling even Rory where she had moved too. She had not called Luke and told him he had a little girl named Susanna who was very sick. _I need to tell him_, Lorelai thought looking at her sick daughter, who was in bed, coloring in a color book. "Why did she have to get leukemia," Lorelai asked angrily. It would take a miracle to save Susanna, the doctors at St. Jude had told her. A stray tear trickled down her cheek.

Susanna looked up from her work. "Are you OK, mommy," she asked. Her blue eyes sparkled inquisitively and she looked worried.

"Yeah, babe, I am," Lorelai replied as she stood, "I'll be back sweetie. Mommy needs to make an important call. You go back to coloring. After her daughter nodded, Lorelai left the hospital room and went down the hall.

Going outside, Lorelai dug into her bag and got her cell phone out.

* * *

In a diner in Starshollow, the phone on the wall ran. Luke jumped and spilled Kirks tea. Luke had been on edge ever since Lorelai went missing six years ago. "Hello. Luke's Diner, Luke speaking," he said.

"Luke," whispered Lorelai. He never thought he would hear her voice again and as he waited for her to continue speaking, time just stopped. "It's me. I know it's been a long time. I'm sorry I haven't called. I needed to get away after our fight. I should've called. I should've of told you sooner, but I couldn't. Ummm…Luke, you, we have a daughter."

"What," Luke said as he sat down on the stool by the phone, "I have a what?" He felt as if all of his breath was knocked out of him.

"You have a daughter. Her name is Susanna. She's six and is so beautiful. She has blue eyes, like me, and she had your hair, except it was longer. She's really sick Luke. She's gonna die soon if I can't find a matching donor. I'm scared. I don't want to loose her."

"I can't believe you didn't tell me! Why didn't you? Lorelai, I can't believe this! Actually, I can! Where are you," Luke shouted.

Lorelai cowered and took a shuddering breath. "Where am I? Oh, um, St. Jude in Memphis. Luke?"

Luke had hung the phone up. He stood hastily. "We're closed! Out now!" His eyes blazed with anger and everyone left as fast as they could.

Without packing, or even locking up, Luke went to the airport. He got the first ticket to Memphis he could.

* * *

Lorelai closed her phone. She put it in her pocket, bowed her head, and wept. After a few minutes, she stood and went to cafeteria. Getting a cup of coffee and a chocolate muffin, Lorelai sat down a booth. She sipped on her coffee and nibbled on the muffin. Drawing her knees up, she sighed and drifted off.

When she woke, Lorelai was in Susanna's room. She looked around and saw Luke sitting there, fuming. He looked exhausted and furious. He was staring at their daughter, who was asleep.

"She's beautiful," Luke said, agreeing with her words that she had said before.

"Yeah, she is. I am so sorry Luke. I kept picking the phone up to call you and I couldn't. I didn't how to say that you had a daughter. As the years went on, it got harder to pick the phone up and tell you. I knew I had to tell you, when I found out she will die without a donor. I haven't even told Rory that she's sick."

"I know. Why did you leave though? I would've been there for you Lorelai," Luke whispered. He sighed and leaned forward.

"I don't know Luke. I was so upset and scared. I just had to go. I panicked. What are we gonna do now?"

_Things were never the same. I wouldn't want them to be. Things are better. Luke and I are closer than ever. We are becoming a family. I don't know how long we will be together or how long Susanna will be alive, but we aren't worrying about the future._

Note: The next chapter will be in Luke's POV. I've edited the story so that Susanna has Blue eyes, now stop flamming me on that one little detail - I want to know what you think of the story, not that I messed one one part. I want helpful critisism.


	2. Luke

LUKE

_For a week, our time together was about the most absurd thing in Lorelai and my life. We were so happy it was sickening. We had no fights, not even about April, and we had fun, no matter what we did. Lorelai always seemed to be beaming. Even Kirk and Taylor didn't bug me. But it all changed in one instant – in one act and I wasn't even there._

* * *

Luke had not seen Lorelai since their break up. He was miserable and angry. But mostly, Luke was beside himself with worry.

He hadn't even seen Rory since the break up. He didn't mind that too much because she was up at Yale and did not get down to Starshollow often. As his mind wandered, the bell above the door jangled. He looked up. It was Rory. "Hey," he said to her as she came over to the counter, "Where's Lorelai?"

Rory let her gaze drift so that she didn't have to look at Luke. "Hey," she said, looking at him, "I don't know where mom is. She just left."

"Why did she leave," Luke asked. His heart jumped into his throat and then it felt like it plummeted. He even felt a little weak in the knees and light headed.

"I can't say. I'm sorry. I wish I could," Rory said, sitting down.

Luke shook his head. "Do you want anything to eat," he asked.

"Coffee and a cheese Danish…to go," Rory said.

"You got it," Luke whispered and went to get the Danish and coffee.

That night, when he closed up, Luke went over to Anna's home. He knocked and tapped his foot. No one answered. He knocked again and waited. "Come on, come on," he whispered. Luke was about ready to knock a third time when April answered.

"Dad," she said stepping aside, "What are you doing here? Am I in trouble?"

"No, no. I need to talk with your mother," Luke said. He gave her a smile and she returned it, but weakly.

"OK. She's in the kitchen, making plans for our 'new life in New Mexico'," April said in a huff.

"Thanks for the warning, I think," Luke said as he went to the kitchen, "Hey, Anna."

"Luke? What are you doing here," Anna asked, sitting the pamphlet she was reading down on the kitchen table.

"We need to talk," Luke said, "Don't move to New Mexico. I know your mom. But listen, we can get her help. Just don't leave. Marry me Anna."

"Oh, Luke," Anna said, "I don't know what to say."

"Say yes," April called out from the living room.

"Go watch mindless TV sweetie," Anna called out. She looked at Luke. Tears were in her eyes. "OK, I will." Anna threw her arms around Luke and hugged him. She then kissed him.

* * *

Six years passed from that day. Luke married Anna two months later. But he never forgot nor stopped loving Lorelai. He wished she was still here, but never voiced his wants to Anna or April.

Anna and Luke didn't stay together for long. She passed away two years after their marriage from complications because of breast cancer. Nothing was the same after that. April was not the same. Because of her mother's death, April was in college, a year early, studying to become a doctor. She was in fact going to Yale and though he hardly saw his daughter, she called often.

Today, Luke was expecting a call from her. She had been waiting to hear if she was the president of the science club and had promised to call as soon as she found out. But, Luke was never expecting this call. "Luke," whispered Lorelai, "It's me. I know it's been a long time. I'm sorry I haven't called. I needed to get away after our fight. I should've called. I should've of told you sooner, but I couldn't. Ummm…Luke, you, we have a daughter."

Luke felt anger surge through his veins. How could Lorelai keep this from him. Slowly, Luke breathed through his nose. "What," Luke said as he sat down on the stool by the phone, "I have a what?".

"You have a daughter. Her name is Susanna. She's six and is so beautiful. She has blue eyes, like me, and she had your hair, except it was longer. She's really sick Luke. She's gonna die soon if I can't find a matching donor. I'm scared. I don't want to loose her," Lorelai explained.

Anger was to a boiling point. "I can't believe you didn't tell me! Why didn't you? Lorelai, I can't believe this! Actually, I can! Where are you," Luke shouted.

"Where am I? Oh, um, St. Jude in Memphis…" Lorelai said, but he cut her off. Luke had hung the phone up. He stood hastily. "We're closed! Out now!" He was so angry, Luke actually scared his customers away.

* * *

Luke reached Memphis around ten that night. He had taken a red eye to get there. He strode down the halls, searching for any sign of Lorelai. He found her, asleep in the cafeteria. When he saw her, all of his anger melted away. Quietly, he crept over to her and carefully picked her up. He walked to the nurses' station. "Where is Susanna Gilmore's room," he asked quietly. The nurse pointed down the hall and nodding, Luke walked silently. Reaching the room with a construction paper sign covered in glitter and "Susanna Gilmore", Luke went in.

He placed Lorelai in an empty chair and then looked around. He took in all of the items Lorelai had used to decorate the room. There were paintings in pink and blue and green and photos of Luke and Lorelai, Rory and Lorelai and Luke, Rory and Lorelai. There were streamers at the ceiling level and glow-in-the-dark stars on the ceiling. A giant teddy bear was in the corner and a red wagon was next to it. He noticed a cd player, many The Bangles cds, and other bands Lorelai enjoyed. He stared at on of The Bangles cds; he then looked at Susanna, his daughter. "You were named for one of The Bangles," he whispered to his sleeping daughter.

Lorelai suddenly woke. She was looking around and then her eyes settled on him. "She's beautiful," Luke said softly. He smiled at her.

"Yeah, she is. I am so sorry Luke. I kept picking the phone up to call you and I couldn't. I didn't how to say that you had a daughter. As the years went on, it got harder to pick the phone up and tell you. I knew I had to tell you, when I found out she will die without a donor. I haven't even told Rory that she's sick."

"I know. Why did you leave though? I would've been there for you Lorelai," Luke asked as he leaned forward.

"I don't know Luke. I was so upset and scared. I just had to go. I panicked. What are we gonna do now?"

* * *

_I don't know if things got better or worse after that day. I do know, things never stayed the same. I don't think either of us wanted things to go back to how they were. I don't know what is going to happen or how long Susanna will be alive, but I hope that she will get to live a full and happy life. _

(Note, the next chapter will be Rory's POV.)


	3. Rory

RORY

_I don't know exactly what happened. Mom and Luke were happy. They were enjoying themselves. Everything seemed back to normal. Then, they weren't together. _

* * *

Rory parked her car in the driveway. She took the keys out of the ignition and got out of it. Striding to the porch, Rory looked around. Nothing much had changed in the years they had lived here, except, the place was bigger – that was recent. Taking the steps two at a time, Rory climbed the steps and then went into the house. 

It appeared empty. Rory checked the living room – no one was there; she went to the hall bathroom, there was not one; she checked the kitchen, no one there either. She saw an open, empty box on the table and went over to it. Rory picked it up and stared at it. "A pregnancy test," she said to herself as she went to the stairs. "Mom," Rory called up the steps.

"I'm upstairs," Lorelai called out. Following her voice, Rory went up the steps. She stopped at the room. A confused look was on her face and the pregnancy test box. was in her hand. "Are you and Luke going on a trip," Rory asked.

Slowly, Lorelai turned and looked at Rory. "Well, uh, you see…no, Luke and I aren't. I am. Have to. Luke and I…broke up."

"What? Were you even going to tell me? Were you going to tell me that you were leaving or were you going to pull a Ginger Rogers and just waltz out of Starshollow," Rory asked as she crossed her arms over her chest. She couldn't believe her mom and Luke were broken up. This was a big shock to her system.

"Of course I was going to tell you. Rory, I-I'm pregnant with Luke's baby. I have to go. I can't stay here," Lorelai explained in a rush.

"Woah, woah, woah. Are you sure," Rory asked as she sat down on the bent at the end of the bed, "Why can't you stay here? What about the Inn?" Her eyes widen and she stares at the floor. _How could this happen_, Rory thought as she licked her lips.

"Oh, honey. I'm sure. I have to go. Sookie can take care of the inn as well as Michael," Lorelai said, "I will back. Don't worry. It won't be long. I just need to get away. Please, don't tell Luke though. I will tell him, when the time's right."

"Don't play an Anna and wait twelve years," Rory warned. Rory did not want her mom to just up and leave. She did not want to be separated from her and Rory didn't really understand why she had to leave.

"I won't," Lorelai said, kissing Rory on the forehead, "I love you." Lorelai started to cry. She wiped them away, but they continued to fall.

"I do too," Rory said as she pulled a tissue out and blew her nose. She stuffed it into her pocket and stared at her mom. _No more crying_, Rory told herself.

"I wish I had a big speech to give in farewell, but I don't. Bye-bye, Rory." Lorelai stood. She grabbed her bag and left without looking back. She couldn't.

Rory wished she had looked back. As she watched her mom go to her car and get in, tears began to fall. She pulled her knees up to her chest and sobbed. She jumped as her phone started to ring. She flicked it open and held it up to her ear. "Hello," Rory whispered as she wiped the tears away.

"Hey, Ace," Logan said flatly.

"Logan, hey! What's wrong," Rory asked as she stood. Pacing, Rory waited for her boyfriend to answer.

"I should be asking you that," Logan said. He paused and didn't say anything. "Rory, I'm moving to London," he finally said.

"What? What did you say," Rory asked, "This day can't get any worse!"

"Yeah it can. I'm sorry. I can't be in this relationship. Good-bye Ace," Logan said, hanging up.

Rory stared at her phone. Her eyes were wide and no tears fells. She screamed and threw her phone on the bed. Sobbing, Rory lay down and cried herself to sleep. For two days, she slept. On the third day, Rory managed to get herself cleaned up and out of the house. She went to Luke's. She entered Luke's and went to the counter. "Hey," he said to her as she came over and then asked, "Where's Lorelai?"

Rory let her gaze drift so that she didn't have to look at Luke. "Hey," she said, looking at him, "I don't know where mom is. She just left." Her voice held no emotion and her eyes were red rimmed.

"Why did she leave," Luke asked her.

"I can't say. I'm sorry. I wish I could," Rory said, sitting down. She sighed heavily and chewed on her lip.

Luke shook his head. "Do you want anything to eat," he asked.

"Coffee and a cheese Danish…to go," Rory said.

"You got it," Luke whispered and went to get the Danish and coffee. When he handed her the bag, she handed him money and left.

Sipping on her coffee and eating the Danish, Rory made a decision. After school was over – she had one semester left – she would go to Philadelphia.

* * *

Her last semester zoomed by fast. In June, she was all packed up and in her car, driving to Philadelphia. Music was blaring and it was six PM, the day after she started, when she got there. 

She stopped in front of the store and stared. Taking a deep breath, Rory got out of her car and went into the bookstore. Rory saw Jess before he saw her. She went over to him with a defiant stride. She stopped just a short breadth away from him. He was putting books on a shelf. Slightly, Rory tapped Jess on the shoulder. He turned and she kissed him. "Let's get married," Rory said after they parted.

"What," Jess said, "Get married? Are you sure?" His eyes were wide. Jess kept looking around for a few minutes before looking at Rory. "Are you absolutely sure," he asked.

Rory nodded. "Yeah, I'm sure. I want to elope," she said taking his hands. Rory looked up into his eyes. "I love you Jess and breaking up with you was the worst thing I could have ever done."

"OK, but what about Logan," he asked. Jess looked into Rory's blue eyes with confusion in his.

"We broke up last year. I realized he wasn't for me. I can't believe I let you go," Rory said. She smiled at Jess and kissed him.

Jess kissed her gently back. "OK. We'll do it tonight, after we close up." Jess smiled and then looked at everyone in the shop. Holding Rory's hand he announced, "We're getting married!"  
"Congratulations!" they cried.

* * *

Five years later, they were still married and living in Philadelphia. Rory was pregnant with their first children – she was having twins. She hadn't seen her mom in six years, she wanted to though – badly. Jess and Rory didn't get to see Luke too often, but made sure to go visit on Thanksgiving, New Years and Christmas. Rory didn't call or talk to her grandparents. She didn't want to explain where her mom was. 

In the middle of the night, Rory woke. Sweat dripped down her back and she screamed. Jess was up and at her side. "Call 9-1-1. Something's…" she whispered, her voice trailing off.

"Shh, I know," Jess said, picking up the phone and calling the paramedics. In fifteen minutes, Rory was at the hospital, but she lost the twins on the way there.

While in the hospital, she called her mom. "Mom," she cried into the phone when Lorelai picked up, "Where are you? I need to see you."

"What's the matter? Did you and Jess…" Lorelai began, but Rory cut her off, "No, we didn't. I lost the twins."

"Oh honey," Lorelai whispered, "Now might not be the best time to come. Flying isn't the best thing to do right after… "

Rory cut Lorelai off. "You're right mom," she whispered, "Will you be coming home soon, at least for a visit?"

"I sure hope so," Lorelai whispered, "Are you still in Philly?"

"Yeah," Rory said, hanging up the phone. She leaned her head against the headboard and stared out the window. A tear trickled down her cheek as she thought about the unknown of her future.

The next chapter is of Rory, Lorelia and Luke.


	4. Luke, Lorlai and Rory

LUKE, LORELIA and RORY

_It has been six years since we had been in the same room together. Will we be the same? Or have we changed so much that we don't recognize ourselves? _

* * *

Lorelai looked at Luke. Tears trickled down her cheeks. Her breath came out in short and sharp gasps. "Luke," she whispered. Her voice was tight and strained. She could hardly talk. When Luke came over to her and wrapped his arms around her, she buried her face into his chest and sobbed.

Luke looked down at Lorelai's head. What had happened? "Lorelai is everything all right," he asked. His voice was soft and comforting.

"Rory was pregnant with twins. She lost them," Lorelai whispered after a few minutes, "She wanted to come to St. Jude's to see me. I told her it wasn't safe."

Luke sucked in his breath. He felt sick. Luke had known that Jess and Rory had been looking forward to having their twin girls. "She shouldn't be flying. You said the right thing," he agreed.

Lorelai suddenly stood. She looked at Luke. "My life is a mess! I can't do this anymore," she cried, "One of my kids just lost their babies and my other is dieing! Does that sound fare? Does it? My life's some Alfred Hitchcock film!"

Luke watched Lorelai. "Listen, you can do this. If anyone can, it's you. Here's what we're going to do, we're getting Susanna well and we're going to go to Philadelphia to be with Rory. What's Susanna's blood type?"

"O positive," Lorelai said. Confusion was in her eyes. What was he thinking? She sat down in a chair and put her head in her hands.

"I'm going to go have my marrow tapped. She'll live," Luke said, going to the door. "Everything's gonna be just fine."

* * *

Two days later, Susanna had a marrow transplant. A week later, they were out of the hospital. "I will be seeing you in six months," Lorelai said as she buckled Susanna into the car. Luke waved to the doctors and said, "Thank-you." He got into the drivers side as Lorelai got into the passenger side and they drove all the way to Philadelphia.

They had started out at 8 AM and reached Rory and Jess's apartment at midnight. Luke carried their bags while Lorelai carried a sleeping Susanna. Luke and Lorelai climb the steps without saying anything. They look at each other and then Lorelai knocks.

Rory yawned. "Who could that be," she said through a yawn. She gets her bathrobe and goes to the door. "MOM," she shouts, opening the door. "Luke," she says looking at him Tears were in her eyes.

"Oh honey. I am so sorry," Lorelai whispers as they come in. She goes over to their couch and lays Susanna on it. "That's your sister," she says hugging Rory.

"She's pretty. She had cancer? I knew she was sick," Rory said, "But didn't know it was that bad."

"Yeah, she did, but she's OK now. I didn't want to worry you. Luke gave her a bone marrow transfusion," Lorelai said looking Rory over, "You look beautiful."

"Thanks," Rory whispers, hugging her mother tightly. Luke came over and gave the two women an awkward hug. All three had no idea what would happen next – the future was unknown and vast.

Fin

Note: Luke's part is mixed in with Lorelai's part.


End file.
